— V. Bhagavathi Kannu

Let me ask you a question. Are you happy for exactly who, what, and where you are in life today? - It maybe your job, business, relationship or any other thing. If you are unhappy, then don’t worry too much. There are many in the world like you unhappy with themselves. There is a way out –to get what you want. Before we discuss that, are you feeling ‘not good enough’ because you believe you’ve failed in life. Do the little thoughts in your head often tell you that you are useless, incompetent , incapable… If that is what you are experiencing ,from now on be aware of such thoughts as and when they creeps in and focus consciously to stop such thoughts. Otherwise such repetitive negative thoughts will make your whole system- body, mind, emotions & energy – agree they are right.

If you are always finding fault with yourself and regretting your past mistakes and failures then you must attempt to change yourself . You have to be at peace and be friendly with yourself and not in war with yourself . In the IT industry, their motto is “user-friendly” , which means the end users will find it easy to use their system. Your motto should be ‘self-friendly’ . You need to love yourself . With a positive self-image only, you can get what you want. Gautama Buddha so profoundly said, “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”

When you want to get something whether it is acquiring wealth or a higher level in your career or become a loved parent or spouse etc.. know clearly what is that you want?. Many people are confused as to what they want. Often they are looking at others and want what they have. Don’t try to live your neighbor’s life. Be on your own.

Once you have a clear idea of what you want, then you need to develop a strong desire in you- a burning desire to achieve what you want. This is your dream. Remind yourself constantly of your desire. Next you should express your desire to all those who are close to you – your family, friends, colleagues.. Repeat as often as possible. Your explicit announcement of your desire will, one- make your system ( body, mind, emotion, energy) prove it, two ,the universe, listening to you all the time will fulfill it.

The philosophers and spiritual leaders say , “ Whatever you think or say most of the times, the universe will fulfill it.

Then put all your efforts to achieve it. There is no substitute for hard and of course smart work. Evaluate your capabilities to find what you need to achieve your goal - if you need to upgrade your knowledge / skills , take up further study, undergo training programs., or you need to put additional hours of work, do so, or improve your method of working, etc…

In my life this is what had happened exactly when I was young. Let me share my friend’s story with you.

When he was 15 years old, his father suddenly passed away. He just entered the final year of his secondary school studies ( called then S.S.L.C). Their family was big his mother, two grandmothers and 5 siblings including him. Their financial condition was bad, not sufficient to meet their needs.


Firstly eight of them have to be fed to survive. Secondly he and his siblings have to get academic education. His elder sister was studying teachers training ,and she got to be married soon. He was the second child – the first male child, supposed to take care of the family in such circumstances. There were suggestions to his mother from close quarters that I should take up a job immediately to support the family.

Despite this condition he had a dream that he should become an engineer. This has arisen in his mind because of his mother’s brother, who had completed an engineering degree course and had taken up a good Govt. job. He was his inspiration. . Studying an engineering degree course requires good amount of money .In terms of timeline, He had to spend 7 more years ( final year in school+ 1year pre-university course( PUC)+ 5 Years engineering degree course).

He had this burning desire and expressed it to his mother and other relatives strongly. His mother was equally interested in his doing engineering course but she was worried that they were not afford. One- the amount of money needed and two-the long waiting time for him to make an earning. However she decided that he first complete his final year in school.

He studied well and passed the school final with good marks. They decided he should study further and they had two options – 1. Study a 3 year diploma in engineering or 2. Study 1 year PUC and then 5 years engineering.

The decision has to be made them. That was a big dilemma. He had promised them that he would study well and complete the course with good marks. There were a lot of deliberations. His mother’s brothers were actively involved and consulted. They want to help them in his education after seeing his enthusiasm and commitment.

Fortunately in the last minute they decided that he should study Engineering Degree Course.

He joined PUC, completed in ’first class’. Then he got admission in a good Govt. Engineering College. He was awarded educational loan for the first 3 years and then he got Merit Scholarship for the next two years, based on my academic performancein the third year. His specialization was mechanical engineering. He studied well and passed out in ’first class’ and was fortunate to get a job in a reputed automobile manufacturing company immediately. Life had turned to be good as he wished for and the entire family was happy and benefited .There was no looking back at their difficult days.

You may say he was lucky. True. He was lucky to accomplish this but behind this luck were the following:

It was his dream to become an engineer.
This dream has become a strong desire which was expressed to all Concerned.

His self-confidence and assurance that he will complete his education well, had erased any doubt in his family members’ mind about his capability to complete the studies. ( His mother used to say later that if he had not shown confidence, she would not have opted for his studying the Engineering).

He put all his efforts to study well and complete the course with good grade.

So whatever be your circumstances now, however bad they is, do not get bogged down. Be clear of what you want to achieve and work hard to achieve .

You will certainly achieve if you have the strong desire, determination and be prepared to put the required efforts. Remember nothing will be achieved without action from you.

As Henry Ford said "Whether you think you can, or you think you can't - you're right".

About the Author
V. Bhagavathi Kannu is a Mechanical Engineering Graduate from Regional Engineering College, ( now National Institute of Technology-NIT), Tiruchirappalli. Held senior IT Management position in Ashok Leyland Ltd, Ennore, India . In Ashok Leyland, he was the chief architect in strategic planning,designing, developing and implementing on-line applications for most key areas of operations in the plantv.

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